Tips for public speaking and some other things
Where I share some of the things I've been thinking about, learning about, and exploring across work, tech, wellness, and life.
Friends,
I was recently invited to talk about my career in technology on the Real Technologists podcast. Recording was easy: Tracy Bannon is a phenomenal host and makes her guests feel at ease. The hard part was listening to the episode. Is there anything more cringe than hearing your own voice?
I have plenty of experience with public speaking going back to high school in the 90s. I spoke at my graduation. I’ve taught courses and led training sessions for work. I’ve sat on panels and given talks at tech conferences.
I’m not a talented speaker. It’s not easy and I don’t enjoy it. What I do love about speaking is connecting with people around interesting ideas and concepts.
Over the years I’ve tried all sorts of hacks and tricks to get over my fear of speaking, and found two principles that work best for me:
Just do it. I tell myself the more I speak the easier it will get. If only! It’s still painful but I won’t let the pain stop me. It’s like building muscle by lifting weights: not something you can do just once. You have to keep at it, regularly, and you are always a little sore afterwards.
It’s OK to suck. Really. Like all successful standup comedians, I’ve learned I can completely bomb a presentation and the world still spins. Some of my talks have been great, some have been pretty awful. I hardly remember which are which. And I remind myself no one judges me as harshly as I judge myself.
Speaking Tips
Fear of public speaking is almost universal. I asked around for more tips from people who, like me, hate public speaking but do it anyway. I got a lot of great engagement (much more on Farcaster than Twitter) and summarized them into 4 principles:
Slow down
Focus on the content
Prepare
Be kind
Slow down
“Breathe between every sentence. It feels _extremely_ long to you, but very normal for listeners.” — timbeiko.eth
“…I funnel all nervous energy/anxiety into focusing on consciously moving my hands very slowly, speaking more slowly etc. The outcome is that the more nervous I am the more confident I appear” — zom
“My main practical tip is to pause often and longer than you think is normal. It signals you're comfortable holding the space.” — Brent Fitzgerald
Focus on the content
It’s about the content, not you.
“For longer talks, honestly the best hack is just to be very comfortable with the subject matter.” — timbeiko.eth
“best motivation i made myself: your goal is to pass information. no clownery, just pass the information, read it off paper if you have to, and then get off the stage.” — king
“Try reframing how you think about the situation. For example, I tell myself that it's not about me but about my audience, what do they want and how can I best provide that?” — eddieosh
“I think about how much I love the content.” — @AndrewDavis_io
Prepare
“Start with brief talks to your cats then dinner parties then TED. If you have a local toast masters, go. Everyone is working on it so it feels a little safer than a seminar.” — trish
Practice, practice, practice, practice. In your car, on video, every day, over and over. Take it beyond memorization.
Try other forms of getting in front of an audience - karaoke, stand up comedy and singing groups.
Be kind
Be kind to yourself. Lower the stakes and give yourself grace to be human.
“It’s like the #1 human fear. You’re not alone” — trish
“When you first get on stage if you’re felling nervous say “wow I’m really nervous” you will feel better and the audience will connect with you” — Connor McCormick. See also: “be authentic and human”. Authenticity is always a winning strategy.
“'"Second Life Living" : you're an avatar on a stage in a game–what's the worst that can happen?” — Denis Hurley
“You gotta remember that no one really cares lol.” —
See also: Spotlight Effect
Do you have any other amazing tips for getting past the fear of public speaking?
Now onto some of the things
As always, a short collection of just some of the things I’ve been doing, reading, and thinking about since my last update:
My episode on Real Technologists where I talked about how I got into Environmental Engineering and how I was able to pivot towards business and programming, my early career at Cityfeet and Aon, how I was introduced to DevOps at Cornerstone, and my commitment to women in tech through Girls Who Code and mentoring. Listen here or on any podcasting platform.
Speaking of early career, I had a mini reunion with some of the developers I worked with in the early 2000s building the first generation of online benefits enrollment software. We hadn’t seen each other in over 15 years and it was great to catch up and reminisce. Between the 4 of us we’ve worked on tens if not hundreds of codebases over 2 decades, most of which felt like they were held together with duct tape and bubble gum, and we agreed that the software we worked on together, FKA HR Portal, was one of the best architected and well-maintained codebases we’ve worked on. Could probably say a lot more about why that is, but I’ll save it for another day.
Yes, I’m still bullish on crypto and decentralization and yes, I still find it to be an exceptionally intellectually stimulating area of innovation. I avoid spending energy convincing skeptics about its potential, but for those curious about crypto, here’s a good paper describing several real-world use cases, including social media, map building, music ownership, brand loyalty, digital fashion, governance, global gig payroll, finance, and more.
Ladies, this Huberman episode with Dr Sara Gottfried is for us! So much packed in about how we as women can architect a better life for ourselves. Wide ranging topics from birth control, IUD, the health effects of living in a patriarchy, continuous glucose monitoring, supplements, nutrition, perimenopause, menopause, phenotype, cortisol, stress, sleep, social and psychological impact of trauma, PCOS. If there’s one thing she suggests we do: get your coronary artery calcium score by age 45. It’s like a CT scan, you can self order it. Score could be 0 but if it’s elevated you’ll want to know sooner than later. Heart disease is the number one killer so best to know signs early.
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Until next time, keep putting good into the world. —adrienne🌏❤️